11 months ago I didn’t think was life was worth living, I was stuck in a rut of “self”- my drinking and drugging feeding the negative outlook I had on life. I was ugly and decaying from the inside out. I was bitter and envious of others- never able to see what I had because I always wanted more, I suffered from a serious case of dissatisfaction.

I cheated. I cheated on every partner I have ever had, except the last 2. From the time I was old enough to date- I was a serial cheat. Another byproduct of alcoholism- always wanting more, what I had was never enough. Now reflecting with hindsight, I can now see how selfish, dishonest and self seeking I was. Ok, ok- hear me out, I know no one wants to hear that they are all these things let alone know that they were the cause for all the misfortune that came their way prior to recovery.

All the experiences that I have had up until this very moment have made me the person I am today- and I like that person. The program has taught me to let go, accept and see the world in a different more kinder light. I never thought I’d be grateful for my past heartaches and mistakes- but I am. I never thought I’d be grateful to be an alcoholic- but I am. I guess you could call that growth.